Redemption song
by McWilsonluvr08
Summary: He wasn't expecting this type of revenge. Not at all. He was horrified.


I almost cried writing this. Merry Christmas everyone, I hope you enjoy the story. I own nothing.

* * *

When he saw the sign advertising karaoke, Sam figured it was a foolproof plan. A non violent way for revenge on his brother who insisted a vampire was a "better brother" than he was. Smiling inwardly, he grabbed a table nearest to the stage, shrugging innocently when Dean raised a brow in question.

"You've gotta be fucking KIDDING me." He grumbled, wincing as an awkward looking young man belted out 'Eye of the tiger' in broken keys. The audience, like Dean had also grown tired of the young man's butchering of a classic. Dozens of broken bottles and an ambulance later, the announcer made his way onto the stage.

"Well that was interesting! I doubt anyone else wants to follow that act!" He goaded, eyes roaming the packed bar for any volunteers.

"He would!" Sam yelled, pointing at his shocked brother.

"_Excuse me_?!" Dean hissed, glaring at his brother. His gaze held what he didn't say out loud: they were supposed to be keeping a low profile. Crowley could be anywhere. The plan was to keep their heads down and figure out a game plan, not grandstand on a stage in front of at least a hundred people.

"He would." Sam repeated, looking Dean in the eyes without a hint of apology. _Not fun being blindsided is it big brother?_

Confusion clouded Dean's mind. _This_ was Sam's idea of retaliation for the text he sent? Why this?

**_I hate being singled out at birthday parties let alone God..._**

_Oh...so this is what we do now Sam?_ Dean grit his teeth. There were few things that he was afraid of, besides flying it was public speaking. Something about having all eyes on him made him feel sick to his stomach.

"We have a brave soul here folks!" The man onstage announced, oblivious to the unspoken conversation unfolding in front of him. He did sense the tension however. "Alright son step up here. I'll even let you pick your own song." He instructed, reaching for Dean's hand.

Narrowing his eyes, ignoring the man with the microphone, Dean did a more thorough inspection of Sam's could care less gaze. The indifference was easy to see, but something else swam in the depths of his little brothers eyes. Pain...anger...and was that _shame_? Startled, Dean looked away. Why would Sam be ashamed?

The year. It had to be the year he took off. The year he didn't look for his own brother. The guilt must have been there all along, but he was too deep in his own hurt feelings to see it. The hell he'd given Sam, the toll it had taken stared him right back in the face.

_Ah Sammy..._

"Let's do this," he found himself saying, taking the strangers hand. "my song is..."

Sam watched in shock as Dean went over to the band to choose his song. Dean couldn't sing, why the hell was he doing this! He'd meant for Dean to stutter and make excuses, have the crowd boo them a little and they'd make their exit. Roll credits. His brother would be embarrassed and pissed but get the point Sam was trying to make. He wasn't expecting this type of revenge. Not at all. He was horrified. The crowd was gonna eat Dean alive. As much as he tried to pretend he didn't care about what others thought of him, Sam knew he did. His heart clenched painfully at what would soon unfold because of him.

"What's...happening here?" A voice full of wonder questioned. Sam jumped.

"Cas what are you doing here?!" He nearly screeched, staring at the angel in disbelief.

"I was called. But there is no danger here." Castiel explained, turning to Sam for clarity on the situation.

"Dean called you?" A twinge of jealousy gnawed at Sam.

"Actually he asked for God to help him. Obviously God can't make it so I'm here. What _is_ here anyway." Castiel offered absently, engrossed in taking in their surroundings.

"We're in a bar outside of Texas. Dean is about to sing. Probably Metallica or something." Sam sighed. He felt sick. He could only imagine how Dean felt. Which made him feel worse. Castiel narrowed his eyes as Dean said something to the band.

"Or something." He echoed, small smile on his face. Before Sam could question him further, Dean stepped up to the microphone.

"This was so not supposed to happen, wow there's a lot of people here," he stuttered, sounding uncharacteristically shy. "Um, I'm gonna dedicate this. To all the parents out there. To anyone, anyone who is a caregiver. Who's ever sacrificed all they had for someone and never complained. To those who would do it all over again, with their eyes closed."

"Hell yeah." A woman said quietly from the back. The audience clapped a little. Emboldened a little, Dean cleared his throat and gripped the microphone tighter.

"When you hold the life of someone in your hands, when you're the only thing between them and the world? You get scared. A life in your hands...it's too big you think. You won't be able to protect them forever. You'll fail. Then you look down at em, you look at em and they look up at you, eyes full of life and love and endless possibilities. And your heart swells. You know that someone somewhere might be able to do the job better, but dammit they'll never love them like you do. Through heaven, hell, and even in between, you'd do whatever it takes to be there for them."

The audience clapped again, and Dean swallowed.

"You die for them, a million times over. Hell if you could you'd sell your very soul for them. There's nothing you want in return. You want them healthy and happy. And as they grow into their own person and start to carve out their own path, it hurts, because while you want so badly to follow, you can't. Because you have your own path and your own journey to see through. You want to make their mistakes for them, you wish you could cry their tears for them, but you can't. You're both on parallel lines, side by side but never meeting. As much as you don't see eye to eye you hope, you pray that they don't forget one simple thing: that you love them and truly want the best for them. That throughout the many years, the conflicts, the misunderstandings, the pain...that's all you've ever wanted." looking away as his voice broke, Dean nodded to the band.

Sam's jaw couldn't drop any farther if it tried. Before he could process Dean's words, his brothers chosen melody played. Lightly tapping the mic to the beat, Dean smiled.

_I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow_  
_And each road leads you where you want to go_  
_And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,_  
_I hope you choose the one that means the most to you._

Sam stood corrected. His jaw dropped impossibly lower. His brother had the voice of an angel! Looking at Castiel, he grimaced. Maybe not an angel. But a beautiful voice nonetheless.

_And if one door opens to another door closed_  
_I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window_  
_If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile_

Sam's eyes filled when his brother smiled fondly at the last part.

_But more than anything..._

Voice breaking a little, Dean pushed on.

_More than anything...my wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to_  
_Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small_  
_You never need to carry more than you can hold_

Sam felt his chest tighten. Swallowing, he tried to suppress a sob.

_And while you're out there getting where you're getting to_  
_I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too...yeah, this is my wish._

Raising a shaking hand to his mouth, Sam felt a few tears break free. He knew what Dean was saying, and it hurt, in such a conflicting way.

_I hope you never look back, but ya never forget_  
_All the ones who love you, in the place you left_

Dean was letting him go. Dean was saying goodbye and 'I love you' all in one breath.

_I hope you always forgive, and you never regret_  
_And you help somebody every chance you get_

His brother was telling him to remember what he taught him. His brother hoped he didn't regret him.

_Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake, And you always give more than you take._

Sam had given up trying to disguise his tears. By now, everyone in the bar was bawling. Except Castiel of course. Unaware of the lone tear sliding down his cheek, Dean sang on, his voice slightly raspy with the strain of holding back tears. If at all possible, it made him sound better.

_But more than anything, yeah, and more than __**anything**__...my wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small_  
_You never need to carry more than you can hold_

Sam knew Dean meant that no matter where he went his big brother would always protect him. He'd always be there.

_And while you're out there getting where you're getting to _  
_I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too...yeah, this is my wish._

Feeling his shoulders begin to shake, Sam buried his face in his hands. He understood. Wherever he went, whatever he did, whatever he might do...Dean loved him, and he always would.

As he repeated the chorus, Dean let his own tears break through. _It's okay Sammy..._he thought, picking up on his little brothers sobs easily every time the music quieted enough to hear the audience. Even if said little brother was trying his hardest to hold the sobs in. Cas was there, which was weird in itself...but then again who'd have thought he'd be singing in a bar after killing a werewolf not two hours ago? Damned full moons. As the music began to fade, Dean sought his brothers eyes and felt his heart warm when Sam instinctively met his gaze.

_This is my wish..I hope you know somebody loves you...may all your dreams stay big..._

The audience erupted in a roar, stomping feet and whistling replacing the tossing of beer bottles from minutes earlier. Amidst the sniffles and cheers, Dean's eyes remained on Sam.

_I understand Sam. I'm gonna let you go._

Sam broke eye contact first, looking down at the worn table, tears splashing onto the surface like an angry thunderstorm.

Wiping his eyes, Dean made a move to return to his table to talk to his brother. The announcer had other ideas.

"Encore encore!" He yelled, grabbing Deans hand and raising it into the air as if Dean had just won a title fight. The crowd cheered loudly in agreement.

Sam sighed. He couldn't take another song.

"I don't understand. His song was meant to reassure. Why are you so upset." Sam snorted. Leave it to Castiel to make a question sound like an observation.

"I'm upset because I'm a shitty brother." He answered, reaching for his beer bottle.

"So am I. Join the club." Dean interrupted lightly, snatching the beer from Sam and taking a long sip.

"Dean..." Sam started, tears in his voice.

"It's okay Sammy." Dean began, but was cut off.

"No it's not. It's far from okay." Sam said, voice bordering on desperate. Dean sighed.

"So what if it is. We've gotten through shit before and we'll get through it again. We will." He vowed. Sam nodded slowly. Before he could say anything else the announcer took the stage.

"Who could ever follow that act?"he asked. The crowd cheered in agreement. "Well we have a taker! Let's give a hand to...Sam!"

* * *

Song used is "My wish" by Rascal Flatts. I heard it yesterday and immediately thought of the brothers. I truly believe that Dean feels this way. I gave Dean a beautiful voice because Jensen Ackles has one. I heard him singing on YouTube at a con and was shocked. I even semi quoted him in the story.

"This was so not supposed to happen...wow there's a lot of cameras here." He said and he was so shy! He plays such a confident character that it never came to my mind that he'd be such a shy person. Check out him singing "The weight" on YouTube. It'll blow your mind. This story isn't complete, I'm far from done:) please let me know what you think about it. Happy holidays everyone!


End file.
